:: Life on Planet Dan-E ::

:: Super Bowl XLIII Recap ::

Almost had it. For two minutes and two seconds I looked like a genius. When I made my pick I wrote, "Since I'm not putting any money on the game, I'm going with Arizona: 23-20." Right there, in the fourth quarter, with 2:47 left on the clock Kurt Warner threw a perfect pass to Larry Fitzgerald, who ran a quick slant and shot up the middle, torching the secondary. After the extra point, the score was 23-20.

With that much time on the clock, anything could happen so I kept my self-high-fives to myself (and because the other people at the bar would have looked at me funny). After all I remembered something else I wrote while listing the reason why they might lose; "...and let's face it; they're the Arizona Cardinals."

As if trying to prove me wrong right after proving me right, they revert back to form. Now, nobody thought that the Arizona offense would stay dormant for long, though no one thought they would do all their work in the 4th quarter. Certainly no one thought they would put up the defensive display that they did. It could have been a blowout but they held Pittsburgh with some impressive goal-line stands, and even forcing a safety by inducing a holding call.

So I guess no one was surprised when QB Big Ben guided his team up the field with an 8-play drive while eluding blitzes and tackles with a series of moves and jukes, somehow keeping the play alive, and managing to look like a tall, unathletic (no it's not a real word) white guy in the process. (Seriously, every time red jerseys surrounded him, he somehow managed to stay on his feet, scrambled away, and looked like he was about to trip even though he was upright. He may look unathletic but Big Ben's got some skills.) As elusive as he was, Arizona missed a lot of tackles and their secondary left too many openings.

You know the rest. 0:29 left and Arizona faltered (though they were at the Pittsburgh 43-yard line; I would loved to have seen what might have happened if Kurt Warner made that Hail Mary anywhere within Fitz's range. Catch or no catch that would have been one hell of a finish). Game, set match Pittsburgh wins.

I can't complain. I even told my brother that I thought the Steelers would win but I'm going to root for the Cards anyway. But like any Super Bowl that doesn't involve my 49ers all I was really rooting for was a good game. It was a great game. Besides, I've been to Pittsburgh and I liked the city. I wouldn’t want to live there but I could think of worse places to visit for a few days, especially if it involves attending a sporting event.

And you know me, I'm going to like any city where their signature food item is a giant sandwich.

Labels: football, picks, sports

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 9:17 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Super Bowl XLIII Pick ::

It's time. Tomorrow will be the game we've all been waiting for. It's going to be a hell of a match and we might see history right before our eyes. Yes folks, the matchup featuring Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal will promise an epic Australian Open Finals.

What did you think I was talking about?

Okay, okay, it's all about football. Sure I love tennis, but I really love football. There are a lot of compelling stories behind this year's Super Bowl that I could get into (and will in a moment) but that would obscure the fact that this game has all the potential to be a classic. Sure, it could also be a major blowout but whatever.

A couple of weeks ago I wrote about stories that news channels will try to milk the way Letterman milks a joke and I was dead on about a few of them. However, there are a few I things I missed that’s worth considering. Such as:

• The Kurt Warner Story: everyone knows the story of his ascent to the NFL elite and his relationship with his wife Brenda, as well his life of great Faith. There's been that and more, specifically how he was all but left for dead after St. Louis released him but found new life in Arizona. But the big story I didn't expect was Brenda's reemergence into the spotlight. All she did was ditch her old military cut and grew out her hair and dyed it blonde. The result is kind of well, attractive. Almost hot, even. Hey, if God gave me a wife that looked that good at that age, I'd worship Him, too. What? I just report this crap.

• Arizona Head Coach Ken Whisenhunt facing his former team in the Super Bowl. It's been mentioned a few times but Whiz, to his credit never played the revenge angle so this story never got going. The story that did develop is that with all his years in Pittsburgh is that he knows how the Steelers game plan. Conversely, they know his coaching style.Yet he knows that they know, and they know that he knows that they know, so they know that he knows and he knows that they know, so everyone knows that they know each other, and... You know what? Never mind.

• Larry Fitzgerald might be the best wide receiver in the game right now. However, due to the ridiculous numbers and his spectacular catches, that angle might be a little overhyped. Yeah he's great but it's still a little early for the Jerry Rice comparisons okay? And I'm not just saying this because I'm a frustrated SanFran 49ers fan. Actually, that's pretty much, why I'm saying it.

• Ken Whisenhunt turning the Cardinals into a respectable franchise just might be the greatest trick play of all time. I wrote this mostly as a small joke, but the truth is he's made some shrewd decisions that led to this point. Unlike his mentor Bill Cowher, he did all this while keeping the spittle to a minimum.

As for my pick, I honestly don't know. Pittsburgh could win because they have the best defense in the NFL this season, feature a balanced offense, QB Ben Roethlisberger is a master of improvisation, and they still have a good number of players left over from their Super Bowl winning team. But Ben is hurt, hardnosed wide receiver Hines Ward is playing with a bad knee, RB Willie Parker and the offensive line is still inconsistent.

Arizona could win because they have a potent offense that torched Philly two weeks ago; two wideouts that could make big plays if Fitzgerald is covered, an underrated secondary, and the whole "no one believes in us" spin. But more often than not, defense wins championships, Anquan Boldin's hamstring is still a question mark, they might not be able to establish a running game, and let's face it; they're the Arizona Cardinals.

As much as I love Kurt Warner('s wife), rooting for the underdogs, and watching history happen, I can see Pittsburgh pulling it off. However, Arizona is playing with an edge, and I think they're just a bit healthier. Since I'm not putting any money on the game, I'm going with Arizona: 23-20. MVP: Edgerrin James.

(Oh yeah; I think - I hope - Federer wins the Australian Open.)

Labels: football, picks, sports

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 11:53 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: And no Taxpayer Dollars were Used... ::

... to construct this stadium just in time for the Super Bowl. What can I say? Stuff like this makes me smile.

Labels: awesomeness, food, football, wtf

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 12:40 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Football Conference Finals Recap ::

It's been determined: The Arizona Cardinals are going to the Super Bowl. People were surprised they weren't immediately booted out of the playoffs but it's a downright shocker - and literally every football column and sports new talking head will be saying this for the next two weeks, to the point that even non-football fans will be saying, "yeah they're not supposed to be here we get it!!" - that the Cardinals made it this far.

Literally, no one thought they would get this far. They "won" their division with a meager 9-7 record. Despite easily beating both Atlanta and Carolina the last two weeks, they four point underdogs against Philly despite playing at home. Many teams have used the rally cry of "no one believed in us" and "no one showed us any respect!" Except in this case, it would actually be true. (The Cards have been worse than just the league whipping boy. Imagine The Gimp from "Pulp Fiction" except even more humiliating.) Don't think for a second they won't use this mentality to galvanize the team.

I mentioned this to my buddy at The Abby last night but this matchup reminds me a lot of Super Bowl XXXIV. Not just because of Kurt Warner's presence but the two teams are stylistically similar. One team features a potent offense and underrated defense while the other is a defensive stalwart with an efficient running game. (Look for this angle to be repeated among the news channels as well.)

Oh wait, there's another team playing in the Super Bowl as well? That would make sense. The Pittsburgh Steelers were expected to go far in the playoffs but their road was a little more impressive, given the higher expectations and playing the toughest schedule. Not only that, their top running back was injured much of the season, taking away the vaunted running game that's the backbone of their offense. And yet here they are.

For last wekend's picks, I wrote on my blog, "this will be a drawn-out defensive matchup where you're going to see some big hits and a few key injuries. It'll be glorious." Rarely have I been more right and rarely have I wanted to be wrong. Do you remember the head-on collision between Ryan Clark and Willis McGahee? This is one of the most brutal, cringe-inducing hits you'll ever see outside of a Kelly Clarkson album. And if you want to see it again, it's right here in all it's neck-snapping glory.

Other things you might see repeatedly on sports news:

• The Kurt Warner Story: all about how he used to bag groceries before playing Arena League Football and NFL Europe before finally taking the NFL by storm with his massive passing prowess; all the while marrying wife Brenda and taking care of her kids like they were his own, and raising a total of seven kids together, and somewhere in there discovering the Holy Grail. Okay, that last one isn't true (it was the Ark of the Covenant). Don't get me wrong, I love the guy and it is a great story if not for the fact that it's already been reported to death back in 2000.

• Arizona Head Coach Ken Whisenhunt and Offensive Line Coach Russ Grimm were both employed by Pittsburgh previous and were considered the top two candidates to replace Bill Cowher when he stepped down, only to have Mike Tomlin take the job. Looking for a coaching version of the "they didn't believe in us" chant as well as the "coming back for revenge" story.

• Look for raging debates about whether or not Larry Fitzgerald is the best wide receiver playing right now. Probably because he's played in NFL purgatory known as Arizona but the only people who really know about this guy outside of Phoenix before this year are Fantasy Football and stat geeks (guilty) and the cornerbacks and safeties he's torched during his career. Philly had the third-best defense as well as a shut-down secondary but Fitz still managed over 100 yards and three touchdowns in the FIRST HALF. Another thing he has going is that pseudo-Superman thing where he shows up at every interview wearing expensive suits and designer glasses looking more like a stockbroker than a gridiron God. Is he the best wide? I'm not sure. Yes, he's fundamentally sound, physically gifted, and has some of the stickiest hands in the world. But unless he works on improving his touchdown celebrations, baiting the media into giving cheap publicity, stops getting along so well with his quarterback, and learns how to be a whiney malcontent, he'll never be considered the best

• Ken Whisenhunt is a genius. He was always regarded as an excellent offensive coordinator with a penchant for will-timed and effective trick plays. Moving to Arizona and turning the Cardinals into a respectable franchise just might be the greatest trick play of all time.
  

Labels: football, NFL, picks, sports

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 11:57 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Football Playoffs 2008: Conference Finals Picks ::

Seasons like this is why I love football. Like millions of people have already said, anyone can beat anybody at any time... unless you're Detroit. Did anyone else think that Arizona could beat Carolina besides me? I thought it'd be a nail biter but it wasn't even close. Of course, no one thought that Jake Delhomme would suddenly become Ryan Leaf and that the Panther's otherwise solid defense would have bigger holes than a used-up porn star. I know I already wrote about this in my recap but come on NOBODY saw this happening... except me. Just saying.

That being said, there's the distinct possibility of going 0-2 this weekend just because there's way too many intangibles to consider in either game to make a confident, clear-cut pick. Despite their hot streak, Philly is favored by 4 points, which I think is the oddsmaker's way of saying "we have no idea how this game is going to turn out". Yeah.

Anyway, on to my picks:

Arizona over Philly:
Why not ride the hot streak? Arizona has a the best wide receiver tandem and Kurt Warner is playing like he's in his early 30s again, and they have a revived defense and running game. Philly's best playmaker Brian Westbrook is injured and QB Donovan McNabb still has a penchant for overthrowing his receivers. The game is in Arizona and Philly is 3-4-1 on the road. This is similar to what I was saying about the Cardinals last week except for some reason, these reasons seem to make more sense with this game.

There's also this: In Week 17, The Cardinals beat the Seahawks, then beat the Falcons in Round 1. Now they could beat the Eagles in the Division finals and depending on how the late game plays out, face the Ravens in the Super Bowl. That means the smallest, meekest bird might beat every other team named after a bird, and those are, at least in nature, larger, deadlier birds of prey. Don't ask me why but I find this very, very entertaining.

(On the other hand the Cardinals lost to the Jets in Week 4. Kinda ironic given the news about the river landing this week. I mean sure, the birds sucked into the engine died but they did after all, take down a jet-engine airplane, which was the point in the football sense. I'm overthinking this, aren't I?)

Pittsburgh over Baltimore:
This game isn't that much different, yet it's very different. Unlike the high-flying (can't let go of the bird analogy) passing offenses of the first game, this will be a drawn-out defensive matchup where you're going to see some big hits and a few key injuries. It'll be glorious.

The Steelers, like the Cards, are on a roll, except the excellent defense has been carrying a sneaky efficient offense capable of a big play or two. The Ravens have to know that they got lucky last week since Tennessee's offense suddenly got a bad case of butterfingers. For all the hype about rookie QB Joe Flacco, he's complete only 20 of 43 pass attempts. The Steelers don't have any big holes to exploit and Tennessee showed you could move the chains against the Ravens. Baltimore's their defense creates turnovers but I don't see their offense being able to convert those opportunities. This is the only game that seems to follow conventional NFL logic. I'd love to see an all-aviary Super Bowl but I just don’t see that happening.

Labels: football, picks, playoffs, sports

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 1:06 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Football Round 2 Recap ::

Last weekend's football results made me nostalgic for the good ol' days when things like home field advantage, experienced quarterbacks, bye weeks, and statistical analysis actually meant something. Instead, we had the goofiest results this late in the playoff in a long time. That sound you heard Saturday evening was the thousands of people who lost money that day.

Tennessee had the best record on the regular season thanks to a stifling defense and balanced, steady offense. Baltimore had an equally good defense but were "led" by rookie QB Joe Flacco. Thanks to three ill-timed fumbles, the Ravens won despite Flacco completing only 50% of his passes, possibly because they were deflected by his unibrow. My pick: Tennessee.

Philly somehow Forrest Gump-ed their way into the playoffs despite playing wildly inconsistent all season. (They lost to Washington twice including a 10-3 snoozer that made soccer games exciting; and a bizarre 13-13 tie to Cincy, one of the worst teams in the league). Beating Minnesota wasn't a big surprise but watching Eli play like it was his rookie year was a little surprising. He let loose more floaters than I do after eating at a Mexican buffet. My pick: New York.

The snow game in Pittsburgh was a classic, if you define "classic" as "complete blowout." Sandy Eggo lost by eleven points but it wasn't really that close. Absolutely true fact; Sandy Eggo had possession for exactly one play, which was an interception in the entire third quarter. Absolutely true fact that I might have made up; Darren Sproles is actually a Hobbit. He's the fastest Hobbit from the Shire and I think maybe the fact that he had to wear spikes slowed him down. My Pick: Pittsburgh.

Carolina was 8-0 at home during the regular season while Arizona was 3-5 on the road, including 0-5 at games played in the Eastern Time Zone. Arizona had the fewest cumulative rushing yards during the regular season (less than even the bottom-feeding Detroit Lions), while Carolina had the third most prolific ground game. Knowing all this, for some reason, I still picked Arizona to win the game. Why? Call me crazy, I had a gut feeling. Also, I wasn't betting any money on it. If I was playing in even a $5 playoff pool, you'd better believe I would have picked the Panthers. (Fuck my life.)

Next week, Arizona and Philly will play for the chance to play in the Super Bowl. It's the only time that two teams with less than ten wins have ever faced off in a divisional championship game. One month ago when both these teams were floundering, if I told you that they'd both be one game away from the finals, you'd think I was hitting the Jack Daniels a little too hard (then again, you could have said the same thing last weekend). You can't predict anything in this league. Anyone can win any game at any time.

Last year, Baltimore was 5-11 and now they're playing in the AFC championship game. Last year, Arizona was 8-8. While they improved by only one game, they're now playing in the NFC championship game. Good God, the Lions might be respectable next year.

(Who am I kidding, they're years away from merely "no long a laughing stock.”)

Labels: football, humor, NFL, picks, sports, wtf

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 11:02 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Football Picks: Round 2 2008 ::

Before I get started I have to mention something: I'm at Starbucks (I know, shocking) and there are two people on adjacent seats taking a nap. Not one of those sorry-I-dozed-off sort of moments. They're leaning back, passed out, and in the lady's case mouth open, head slumped back, and very deep into her REM-cycle. I joke about Starbucks being my second home and all but I don't actually SLEEP here. They're not exactly hobos either. The guy is wearing new Nikes and the lady has sunglasses with "GUCCI" across the side. This is too funny.

That being said, these two still aren't as dormant as Miami's ball protection against Baltimore last week. Everyone was talking about how the Dolphins rarely turn over the ball. Having seen most of the games this season, I can say that a lot of that was sheer dumb luck. In literally every game QB Chad Pennington had at least a two or three passes that made people ask "what were you thinking?!" Every now and then it would result in a crippling interception.

Speaking of which, Ed Reed is the biggest stud right now. I haven't seen a ball hog like this since Kobe Bryant's rookie years and that's saying something for a guy playing on defense. Of course, this is the same Ed Reed that got jacked up by a wide receiver so I'm not surprised he's playing like he has something to prove.

I think the sleeping lady just drooled. With that note, and before I get distracted any more, on to the picks.

Titans over Ravens:
I'm going to be the 2,174,823rd person to say that the Titans remind me of the Ravens back when they won the Super Bowl: stifling defense, strong running game, and a veteran QB that doesn't make mistakes, and a very good special teams unit. Of course, the current Ravens look a lot like that as well; only they have a rookie QB with eyebrows that look like they could withstand a zone blitz by themselves. It's going to be low-scoring, physical, well-coached, smashmouth game that just might remind everyone why they became fans of football in the first place.

Cards over Panthers:
This one is almost too easy: The game is in Carolina, the Panthers are 8-0 at home, Arizona is 3-5 on the road and those losses weren't even close. That's why I think this game has "upset" written all over it. Arizona almost won last time they played and unlike then, the Cards actually have something resembling a running game now. It remains to be seen if the Running Back formerly known as Edgerrin James can continue his rebirth from Week 17 and Round 1. I was gonna pick Carolina but just barely; this might be closer than everyone thinks.

(By the way, isn't it weird how after all this time, that "The [Fill in the Blank] Known as [Name]" joke still kinda works? Forget his great music, I'll always appreciate Prince for this particular contribution to pop culture. Sorry, got distracted again.)

Giants over Philly:
This is the second year in a row where the last remaining Manning is Eli. Sibling rivalry being what it is, I have believe that on some level, Eli is loving every moment that big brother is up in the luxury box pretending to root for him while he's on the field defending his team's Super Bowl Title. If he does win this year, I have a feeling that Eli's going to rub his second Lombardi Trophy in Peyton's face and say, "you like that? You like that?! This is for talking me into doing those dumbass Oreo commercials. Bitch."

Steelers over Chargers:
I almost took San Diego in this game. Darren Sproles is awesome almost made LaDanian Tomlinson seem like an afterthought. Phillip Rivers did anything and everything to win that game while Pittsburgh QB Ben Roethlisberger spent the last two weeks trying to remember how to spell his name. (By the way, that's his third concussion - Non-motorcycle Injury Category.) Steelers have the better defense but the Chargers have a better O-line, running back (even minus LDT), and QB. Bad news is they're coached by Norv Turner so that cancels out some of those advantages. That and Pittsburgh has a unique homefield advantage: Heinz field is loud, the weather is going to be icy, and the field is going to be muddy, mangled, and slippery. It's exactly the kind of game John Madden would love if he were alive today.

EDIT 4:15: I already posted my pick but did I say that Arizona just might win this thing? I just have a gut feeling but... ugh. We'll see what happens when the game actually starts.

Labels: football, picks, playoffs, sports

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 2:45 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: 2008 Season Football Picks: Playoffs? Talk about, Playoffs? ::

I haven't done my football picks in a while but lest ye worry, I've not lost my love for the game. I just haven't been blogging about it. Since one of my resolutions is to at least attempt to blog more often it might as well be about something I like. (I like women too but not much going on there. Or at least nothing I want to blog about.)

It's been a fantastic season so far. The Lions went an historic 0-16. The Cowboys soap opera of a season fizzled out worse than "Melrose Place." The Falcons and the Dolphins, after awful seasons, returned to playoff form thanks to new coaching and management. An 8-8 team (Sandy Eggo) is hosting their first playoff game while an 11-5 (New England) team gets to watch. My SanFran 49ers somehow Forrest-Gumped their way to a 7-9 season, setting up for a potential playoff run next year. (Of course, I said that two years ago and I've been punching myself in the stomach ever since.) Did I mention that Cowboys collapse?

(I only wish that someone had actually punched Terrell Owens in the face at some point. I'll freely admit my shadenfreude toward any rival team, by the way.)

Anyway, here are my picks for the first round of the playoffs.

Arizona over Atlanta:
I hate the Cards because they play in my division but I love Kurt Warner. I also really like Larry Fitzgerald because he reminds of a cool Irish guy I went to college with named Patrick Fitzgerald. He also had a nice cousin named Gerald Fitzpatrick. (I love that joke.) His wide receiver counterpart also came back from a broken face. (I mean literally a BROKEN FACE. Dude is a stud.) Gotta like that. Finally, given the choice between the QB who's actually won a Super Bowl versus a gifted but green rookie QB, I'll take the veteran.

Indianapolis over San Diego:
Everyone seems to be picking the Charger because they won four games in a row to close out the season, including a "playoff" elimination game against Denver. That's nice and all but Indy went ahead and won NINE games in a row to finish the season. So there goes the momentum theory. We're also talking coaching matchup of Norv Turner vs. Tony Dungy. Again, I'm taking the guy with a ring.

Baltimore over Wildcats:
While at the Dolphins this season, there were two guys wearing Miami jerseys sitting near me. When they fell behind, one guy said they needed to throw more long bombs. The other replied, "bro, Pennington's bomb is eight yards." That's Dolphans for you. Rookie QB over limp-armed veteran? I hate this pick but I have to go with the better defense. I really wanted to pick Miami since I still live here and I don't want angry Dolphans breaking down my door. Then I remembered they're somewhat apathetic fairweather Johnsons and none of them know where I live. That and I'm not even sure anyone from Miami reads my blog anyway.

Minnesota over Philadelphia:
I hate this pick even more. If this was a regular season game I'd probably call this game a tie and there’s a 30% chance of being right. Yeah Philly beat Dallas (which made me happier than I should have been) but it was as much a case of the Cowboys self-immolating. Since I can't think of anything else to say about this, I'm going to revert to my Nature Theory and pick the Vikes since in nature, I'm pretty sure a Viking can kill and Eagle.

There it is. Enjoy the games.

Labels: football, picks, playoffs, sports

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 3:48 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Dolphan for a Day ::

Once again, my little brother sent me tickets to a Dolphin game for my birthday (which was a while ago so please no belated wishes, I'm depressed about my age as it is) and once again, I went with my buddy Chuck. He's one of the few Miamians who would appreciate a respectable Dolphins team.

When he bought the tickets around Week Two it was just another division game versus the Patriots. Tom Brady just got hurt and the Pats looked awful. The constantly crappy Dolphins just got smacked around by the perpetually sucky Arizona Cardinals (which is like losing a footrace to a pre-Subway Jared).

It's hard to see how the season will unfold that early. Since then, Matt Cassell has developed into a decent starter for the Pats. The Dolphins have gone 6-2, and Arizona is the leader of the NFC West (which is like being "Best Porn Star" two years in a row; sure you're winning but you still suck.)

Both teams came into this game with identical records and a second wind. The Patriots salvaged their season after much uncertainty, and the 'Phins, um, sucked most of this decade. It went from being just another game to a real rivalry matchup.

Our seats were upper deck but right around the 25-yard line. Unfortunately, we were on the visitor's side so were surrounded by obnoxious Boston fans. (I started to get annoyed at the number of Red Sox hats around. As long as we're talking about this, I had laugh at how many Culpepper jerseys I saw there. I can understand wearing old Marino jerseys; he was a local legend. But Culpepper signed for one year, spent half of it on the disabled list and wasn't very good when he did play. I think Miami fans have become so despondent over the state of their team that they prefer clinging to what could have been over what's actually happening. And I complain about being a 49ers fan. Sorry, I digress.)

It was a fun game to watch live. Neither team could run the ball so all the passing kept things interesting. Miami kept it close but you tell early on that New England's offense had a slight edge. Miami had a couple of dropped passes early on that killed drives and would set the tone for the rest of the game. Chad Pennington had a very good day but I've never seen him play a game where he doesn’t have at least one throw that made you realize why Hootie is crying.

Sure enough, in the 4th quarter, down by ten points and pinned at their own 20 Pennington lobs up a floater for an interception that crippled any chance at a comeback. Up until that point, it seemed like Miami could at least tie the game, since neither team had much trouble marching up and down the field. Instead, that crippling interception just to demoralize the team. Not long after, I noticed Dolphans leaving early to beat traffic. (Why do people continue to deride just Los Angeles sports fans for leaving early? I see this almost everywhere.)

NE would go on the score ten more points, leaving my buddy Chuck in a state melancholy that no amount of beer could cure and he also left early. What started as an interesting game became a blowout. Not to say that we didn't have fun... quite the opposite. The mostly good-natured trash talking between the Pats fans kept things lively. Unlike last year’s low-scoring snooze fest, Miami scored four touchdowns, which gave the Phans a chance to sing the Miami fight song over and over again. (The song itself is kinda lame. Of course I sang along.)

Labels: football

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 9:41 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Football Woes ::

I've been a long time SanFran 49ers fan through the good times (back when we won the Super Bowl XXIX against Sandy Eggo 1995) and through the bad times (pretty much every year since then). I've tried to stay loyal when we became the laughing stock the last few years, but I had a glimmer of hope when we hired coach Mike Nolan.

When Nolan was fired, Mike Singletary, known in Chicago as the "Heart of the Defense" and having borderline psychotic intensity on the field during his years as a linebacker, seemed like a good idea at the time.

This guy spends his offseason as a motivational speaker, so it was reasonable to assume he'd be able to spark some intensity into an otherwise lackadaisical team.

And then he pulls this stunt. His reasoning? "I used my pants to illustrate that we were getting our tails whipped on Sunday and how humiliating that should feel for all of us. I needed to do something to dramatize my point; there were other ways I could have done it but I think this got the message across."

First off, why in the name of Venus' taint did this ever become public? Is this really something you want reported in the news? Second... for the love of God WHY?

I think I need to find a new football team. Any suggestions?

Labels: football, frustration, wtf

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 12:05 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Football Pool ::

Even though I haven't been posting my weekly football picks on my blog, I'm still doing it for the "office" pool at the Steakhouse. Two weeks into this already interesting season, I've won two in a row.

Now, I'm not some Football Picks Genius or anything. It's more a reflection of the talent (or lack thereof) I'm going up against. And just plain dumb luck. Last week I went 12-4 and won easily despite picking Oakland to win. Yeah.

This week was a bit more touch and go. Out of the eight early games, I only picked four correctly (Minnesota, New Orleans, you're dead to me). I thought I was out right then and there and didn't really pay attention to the rest of the scores with much interest. Except somehow my SanFran 49ers (pulled out a win against Seattle, a pick no one else made. I went six for six in the afternoon games.

(It wasn't just luck. I picked my 49ers because I honestly thought Seattle was terrible and our defense is underrated and... Who am I kidding. We beat a crappy team by three points in overtime. It was sheer, blind, stupid luck.)

I found out that the pool came down a bartender and me. I like the guy but I really wanted, needed, to beat this guy because he knows absolutely nothing about football. He's one of the guys who thinks soccer is mistakenly called football (foreigners are so cute when they do that). And I could not let this guy beat me. To win I needed Dallas to win and I need the total points to close to 64 (he guessed 25).

No problem. I anticipated a high-scoring shootout. I just need Dallas to win. What killed me is that I had to, for a few hours, root for the fucking Cowboys. And for Terrell Owens. If you've read my blog for a few years, you know how much animosity I have for that idiot. No problem, I was working anyway, and we were lucky to be busy enough that I didn't have to stand around and watch the game. Thanks to a few bonehead plays by Philly, the Cowgirls pulled out a win. Sweet.

Let's see now if I can go three for three.

Labels: football, picks, sports

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 12:08 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Dolphins ::

I never blogged about this before but, what the hell. Some of you might lose respect for me after I admit this... but I've always been a fan of Hootie and the Blowfish.

One of their early, very popular songs called "Only Wanna be with You" (which i can play and sing along to on guitar... shut up) has the lyrics "... I'm such a baby 'cause the Dolphins make me cry." For the longest time, I though these guys were environmentalists who were upset over dolphins dying in fishing nets or something.

It wasn't until I moved to Miami that I discovered that these guys, especially Hootie, are merely hardcore fans of football, specifically the Miami Dolphins.

That there, is the textbook example of something called "overthinking."

--

And as I plug the most American of all popular sports around the world, I bid you all a happy Fourth of July.

Labels: football, introspective, music, my life, thinking too much

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 2:03 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Nothing better to do? ::

Anyone who reads my blog knows I'm a huge football fan. I've followed my SanFran 49ers since the Joe Montana era. You might think I live and die during the months of October to January depending on how they do, which isn't too far from the truth. But at its core, football is entertainment, nothing more. It's one vehicle for men (and women) who follow the desire to be a part of something larger than themselves, however absurd, ephemeral, or sophomoric our devotion may seem to others. We love our teams, we love the sport itself, and we know that although Our Team may have lost in the playoffs/not made the playoffs/sucked so bad you wanted to disown them, life goes on and there's always next year.

That being said, what the FUCK is up with this shit?. Seriously, there's the Michael Vick issue, players out there causing shootouts at strip clubs, and players still trying to take steroids and other performance enhancing supplements but forget all that. Those long-haired bastards need to see a barber.

I mean, really? This is what the powers that be of the National Football League are going to discuss?

Granted, this is the merely the suggestion of one team president of one football team - Kansas City Chiefs president Carl Peterson- who by the way, hasn't been able to put together a winning team since Dick Vermeil retired a few years ago. But the fact that it's actually important enough of an issue that it'll be discussed during the NFL owner's meeting tells me that some people who run the league are incredibly shortsighted and out of touch.

Look, I realize that for me to get all riled up about something this trivial (from any perspective really, be it from team owners to the casual fan) is a bit absurd, considering there's so many other things out there that I can get riled up about. I know that there are other things that concern me more. But reading about this affected me in a way I can't exactly explain, and it's not just because I'm a football fan with long hair that's almost down to my ass (okay, maybe a little).

The NFL has had an image problem the last couple of seasons. Players testing positive for drug tests, several criminal convictions, players being caught with gun arsenals, and even allegations of cheating among the coaching ranks. This article argues my point more eloquently than I can (and gayer... seriously, "Waiting to Exhale" dude? Take a day off and watch "Caddyshack" or something) and I'll paste a few points.

...players wear their hair long for reasons beyond fashion or to be rebellious. For example, Pittsburgh Troy Polamalu does it as a tribute to his Samoan heritage and Jacksonville's Lamont Thompson as a way to remind himself to be patient. And as a man who has grown locks twice in my life, I can tell you starting them can be very spiritual and maintaining them a source of pride. Like fingerprints and DNA, no two heads of locks are exactly the same.

...No, I see it as another way to make corporations comfortable about the NFL because its image has taken a severe hit the past couple of seasons. Whitewash the personality so that the product is more palatable to a broader audience.

I'm going to wake up tomorrow and think about the day ahead and the upcoming weekend. I'm going to study for the upcoming wine test I need to take at my new job. I'll watch CNN and consider the upcoming election. And I'll probably wonder if I'll be able to wake up in time to get in some tennis Saturday morning. And even if some of my favorite players have to cut their hair to meet uniform standards, I'll probably still follow football with the same fervor as your average football freak.

But at least I have a modicum of an idea of what really matters.

Labels: 'roids, football, hair, rants

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 12:16 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Super Bowl XLII Recap and Random Thoughts ::

Wow. Wow. WOW what a game. That's about as exciting a 17-14 game you'll ever see. Perhaps it's relative to the expectations of a blowout by the Patriots, or maybe it was the sense that you'd be watching history and not much else, or maybe it was just one hell of a game. Unlike past Super Bowls virtually the whole game was better than any of the commercials (those cartoon things for some sales company... what the FUCK was that shit? Somewhere out there is some art-school reject, hack of a creative team that actually thought THAT shit would be worthy of a Super Bowl spot? And I'm still working behind a bar? I'm quitting my job tomorrow.)

Eli Manning won the obligatory "Winning-Quarterback-gets-the-MVP" Award and an Escalade... Hybrid? (A full-size SUV hybrid. That's like putting a radar detector into a Geo Metro. Or squeezing a fat guy into biker shorts. Or giving a guy with no arms a lifetime of free porn. I could go on. I have a notebook full of these.) Anyway, Eli got the award but the real MVP was the Giants' amazing defense. That pass rush was suffocating and Michael Strahan, Osi Umenyora and company put Tom Brady on his back more than Michelangelo.

Anyway, some random thoughts:

- Somebody please, please, PLEASE track down Tiki Barber and put him on camera to give his thoughts about the Giants winning it all the YEAR AFTER HE RETIRES. One year after he quit because his claimed coach Tom Coughlin made lose his love for the game (read: I'm a egomaniacal diva that wants everything my way and the coach is a big meanie). My guess is that he's in the corner of his apartment, curled up in a ball, clutching his blankie, weeping, and mumbling in tongues.

- Why do people call them the "New York Football Giants?" is there a beer-league softball team or a women's basketball team in New York that calls themselves the Giants, too? Someone explain this to me, please.

- Tom Petty was awesome but does anyone else think that he's starting to look a little corpse-like? I'm not saying he's anywhere close to Keith Richard's level of decomposition but it's probably a good thing he grew that beard. Otherwise, his cheeks might look hollower than, say, an 18-1 season.

- There were two moments in the game where the football fan might think, "okay, this is where the Patriots take over." The first one was the "too many men on the field" penalty that went against the Giants. The other was the floater that Manning overthrew to a wide-open Plaxico Burress. Considering the ruthless efficiency the Pats have been playing with all season, you figured that Brady go into action hero mode reminiscent of those cheesy 80's movie where Schwarzenegger or Stallone become indestructible in the last 10 minutes of the movie. Never happened.

- If I told you the Giants scored a mere three (3) points in the first half, yet went on the beat the Pats by three (3) points, not only would you rightfully question how much beer I'd have, you'd probably wonder if I finally caved in and started doing hard drugs.

- This is the second year in a row where a Manning knocked Brady out of the playoffs. Maybe he'll start doing more commercials, you know, to get his name out there. Not that I feel bad for him. He's gonna go home and sleep with Gisele Bundchen. If that doesn't make you feel better, you might as well be dead.

- That play in the 4th quarter where Eli miraculously avoided getting sacked, composing himself, heaved a pinpoint pass to David Tyree who made a ridiculous circus catch where he actually pressed the ball on his helmet to maintain possession was one of those "holy shit" moments, as in "holy shit, the Giants might actually pull this off." That and half the guys at bar actually said "holy shit!" when that play happened.

- Does this mean that we're going to be subjected to a bunch of Eli Manning commercials now?

- The Giants secondary did a great job keeping Randy Moss from getting too wide open. On Brady's second to last Hail Mary pass, Moss was double covered but if he just jumped and made a concerted effort, he just might have come down with the ball. Is it was, he looked lackadaisical.

- And to think Strahan almost retired. Think he's glad he decided to stick around?

- Tom Brady is human after all. A human with tons of athletic talent, loads of cash, a rockstar level of fame, and a disturbingly hot girlfriend.

- By the way, does anyone know if Bridgette Moynihan, Brady's baby-momma ex-girlfriend (that's what it says on her business card now, since she hasn't actually acted in anything for a while) have anything to say about this game? Does anyone know which team she was rooting for?

- Seriously, I wanna know what Tiki is doing right now. Is he crying hysterically? Is he tearing apart his house in an uncontrolled rage? Is someone talking him down from the balcony right now? I need to know these things.

- I just got off the phone with The Hostess and she told me she found Tom Petty boring. Boring!!! That's it. We're done. Through. Unless she buys me a beer the next time we hang out. I'm that easy.

- Just a few more weeks until pitchers and catchers report.

Labels: football, random thoughts, sports, Super Bowl, the hostess

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 10:19 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Cowboys vs. Packers Week 13 Game Diary ::

So once again, I'm at Dewey's for another Football Game Diary. This should be a good game, with two teams that have potent offenses and solid defenses. There's also the Brett Favre vs. his heir apparent, Tony Romo. They both make these ridiculous plays off that no other quarterback seems to be able to make. Both teams are 10-1, both lead their divisions and both are considered the class of the NFC. Finally, both teams at one point or another beat my 49ers in the playoffs repeatedly during the 90s so I have a certain competitive animosity towards them. I just wanna see a good football game, though if you put a gun to my head, I’d have to pick Green Bay just because I hate them less.

8:24 Favre throws a rope to his receiver who catches it two inches off the turf. You hear about analysts touting a quarterback's ability to put the ball where only his guy can make the play but Favre makes throws where even his own guy can barely get to it.

8:28: Field goal. Green Bay up 3-0.

8:29: Dallas has the ball. It’s no secret that Romo grew up idolizing Favre. Let's see now if he can play while completely starstruck.

8:31: High throw to Owens and Green Bay cornerback Al Harris rips the ball from the his hands. Looks like it happened out of bounds. Green Bay challenge.

8:36: Nope. Dallas ball. Play continues and they finish with a field goal.

8:43: Green Bay starts with a run up the middle and the running back gets clobbered by Dallas safety Roy Williams. This guy is brutal. It's not just that he's a hard hitter; he also forced the NFL to adopt a rule change preventing horse-collar tackle (the "Roy Williams rule") because he broke too many ankles. Someone you want on your side, yes?

8:46: Like last time, I ' hear the commentary but whoever fed the jukebox loves Metallica so at least the music is good. And somewhat appropriate. I just need someone to play "For those About to Rock" by AC/DC and we're golden.

8:49: The first few running plays by Dallas were with Julius Jones. Last year, he accused Bill Parcells of "not utilizing his skillz properly" or something to that effect. He had the chances to be the started lost it Marion Barber. So clearly, it's not the fault of the previous coach, he just sucks ass. And I'm not just saying that because he killed my fantasy team last year.

8:51: Terrell "Alligator-Arms" Owens just dropped a very catchable, short pass that could have given Dallas 1st Down. My manager, who's a lifelong Cowboys fan, has this love-hate thing with Owens and I can imagine him shouting at his TV right now.

8:53: Field goal Dallas. I just noticed that the referees are wearing black pants. Anyone know what's up with that? Ref uniforms just don't look good with black pants.

8:54: Was I just talking about clothes there? Sorry about that, gay moment over. Back to the game.

8:56: Oops. Favre just threw a pick. They showed a stat that says this is his first INT is 139 attempts. Remember a couple of seasons ago when it seemed like Favre threw that many INTs in one season and everyone was saying he should retire? Good times.

8:58: Touchdown Dallas; Romo to wide receiver Patrick Crayton. So far, no evidence of Favre-worship. If this was last season, Owens would be throwing a hissy fit that the pass wasn’t to him.

9:05: Green Bay runs Ryan Gant (who?) up the middle and scores a TD. See what happens when you incorporate a running game?

9:13: Another touchdown pass to Anthony Fasano (gee, you think maybe he's Italian?). If this was last season, Owens would be throwing a hissy fit that the pass wasn't to him.

9:17: Deion Sanders is doing sideline reporting, except he's not talking directly into the camera. He's wandering around, talking with his hands, while staring off into space. Apparently the NFL Network thinks this is good idea. I guess that's one benefit about having the sound off.

9:24: You're not going to believe this but Favre just threw another interception. Would this be a good time to mention that Favre has NEVER won a game at Dallas?

9:26: Romo throws another TD to Fasano, except when he falls it the ball rolls loose. Did he have possession or did the ground knock it loose? Green Bay challenges and... no good. Fasano never had possession.

9:29: No problem, short pass of Owens, and this time he manages to hold on. I hate him. I really, really hate him.

9:33: Favre got up clutching his right arm the last time he got sacked so now Aaron Rodgers is in.

9:34: ...and he nearly gets picked off throwing into double coverage.

9:36: ...then he overthrows a short pass to the running back. All that time apprenticing under Brett Favre is clearly paying off.

9:40: Romo slings it out deep to Owens, who has to slow down to get it, while cornerback Al Harris keeps running. Hey Al? This isn't a track meet. So far Dallas has been maintaining constant pressure on the Quarterback. Romo has been knocked down but he's had a lot more time in the pocket. Second series in a row that Rodgers is in.

9:44: I wonder how serious Favre's injury is. They just showed him on the sideline. There’s no splint or tape on his arm but he's still holding it. Back on the field, the kid is doing well on this series. No risky throws, some accurate short passes, and they're now at Dallas' 20.

9:53: Short pass to Greg Jennings, who jukes and weaves his way to the Endzone. 27-17 Dallas.

9:56: 31 seconds left and Dallas kneels to take it into Halftime. Important stats:
Passings:
Favre: 5/14, 56 yards, 0 TD, 2 INT. Rodgers: 5/8, 69 yards, 1 TD, 0 INT
Romo: 9/15, 197 yards, 3 TD, 0 INT

Rushing:
Green Bay: 90 yards, 1 TD
Dallas: 39 yards

Green Bay started off with the short pass/run attack and everything fell apart when Favre reverted back to 2005 form by chucking the ball deep. Going back to the game plan with Rodgers resulted in a touchdown. Defensively, neither team has any sacks but Dallas has been far better at pressuring the passer, while Green Bay has done a pretty good job and holding the running backs, although their defensive backs have been vulnerable. On the plus side, they’ve held Terrell Owens to only 147 yards and 1 TD so there's hope.

10:10: And we're back. Favre is still out with what looks like an injured elbow.

10:22: Green Bay is back to the short passing game. The longest throw by Rodgers so far is about 12 yards, but it seems to be working. He's mobile enough to make some plays with his feet if there's nothing open.

10:27: 3rd and goal, and Ryan Grant (seriously, who?) punches it in for a TD. 27-24. Considering the turnovers and how relatively easily Dallas is moving the ball, the score should be higher.

10:30 That reminds me, I remember after they got bitchslapped by New England how Dallas Coach Wade Phillips said afterwards that the game plan was to "stop the running game and make Tom Brady beat us." It wasn't a great idea in retrospect, and it wasn't even a great idea to begin with. Brady's been an elite quarterback for years now and you want to make him beat you? THAT'S your game plan? It's like someone saying "we're going to walk Kevin Youkilis and make Big Papi beat us." Or "we’re going to stop Scotty Pippen and force Michael Jordan to make the shots."

10:45 I just saw Harris knock Owens down on his back, then move to tackle Barber. Don't ask me why, that just made me smile.

10:49: You have to see this play to believe it: Perfectly placed short pass to a WIDE OPEN Owens in the Endzone, and he bobbles it! Not only did he bobble it, he somehow batted it away from himself, the ball goes flying into the hands of Harris. INT, and a touchback. The ball was in his hands; enough that he virtually cradled it. The every day equivalent would be if you asked me to pass the salt and I came up to you, gently placed a salt shaker in your hands, you wrap your fingers around it, and yet somehow it still ends up on the floor and makes a mess, causing seven years of bad luck. I find myself smiling yet again. I can't prove it but I think my manager just threw his glass at the TV.

10:56: ...and after all that, Green Bay punts.

10:57: Like the last time I did this, I ordered the chicken fingers. I really wanted a burger but Dewey's burgers are big, greasy, and kinda messy (in other words, perfect) and I didn't want grease all over my keyboard. Of course the chicken fingers are a little greasy too but they're more manageable than a one-pound bacon cheeseburger. Yes, I thought this all out.

11:04: Romo throws a deep bomb and gets a pass interference call, putting them at the 2-yard line. Pass to Crayton, touchdown, 34-24 Dallas.

11:13: Rodgers is having an amazing game considering this is the longest time stretch of time he’s ever played since he got drafted. Again, he's not doing anything spectacular but he's moving the ball, running around to buy time, and not making mistakes. He led the team to another scoring drive, 34-27.

11:17: I just saw 6-1, 188lb Al Harris try to take down 6-5, 265lb Jason Witten and it made me laugh. You had to be there.

11:26: 1:51 left in the game and Dallas is running with Marion Barber to eat up the clock. They manage a field goal and lead 37-27. 1:03 left in the game.

11:30: Favre is out for the night. I wonder how serious his elbow injury is? Is his consecutive games streak going to come to an end?

11:33: Too bad, Rodgers starts out with a couple of completions only to have the next couple dropped by his receivers. Turnover on downs, Dallas kneels, and they win 37-27.

The Cowboys will probably end up with home field advantage once the playoffs start but as it stands now, New England is still the team to beat, and neither team seems like they have the overall game to beat the Patriots.

Labels: Dewey's, diary, football, NaBloPoMo

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 11:20 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Football: Week 13 Preview ::

I had a lot of fun writing a football Diary when my SanFran 49ers played Arizona during Week 1 so I was going to write a game Diary of this week's marquee Dallas Cowboys vs. Green Bay Packers game. I had the night off, and it would be a great way to kill a post for NaBloPoMo but I found out that the game is only going to be on the NFL Network, which is only available on certain cable providers and only for a premium charge.

This sucks. The last time I did the diary, it was at a dive/sports bar where the atmosphere was fine but I couldn't hear any commentary. Now, thanks to the NFL's fascist cable policy, the only way I can do this is if I go to a sports bar that carries the NFL Network and down Guinness and chicken wings while the game is on.

Insidious bastards.

Labels: Beer, diary, football, NaBloPoMo

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 3:23 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: The Replacements ::

"I look at you and I see two men: the man you are and the man you ought to be... "
- Gene Hackman from "The Replacements"

You wouldn't think that some cheesy line from a "so-bad-it's-good" football flick would mean much. I was flipping channels after "SportsCenter" and "The Replacements" happened to be on. I've seen it before but it's one of those films that I'll watch till the end if I run across it. You've probably never watched (because you have a life) it but it's worth watching just for the sheer Unintentional Comedy throughout the whole flick.

There's Keanu Reeves, who's shockingly effective as the quarterback There John Favreau playing the psychotic adrenaline junkie defensive back (you occasionally see him with a "wait, I was in the movie 'Swingers' and now I'm doing this?" look on his face). There's Gene Hackman mailing it in shouting clichés with a "wait I was the start of 'Hoosiers' once, wasn't I?" look on his face. And my favorite character was the lovely Brooke Langton as the head cheerleader/love interest/Wonderbra spokesperson whose previous claim to fame was one of Billy's girlfriends on "Melrose Place" (yes, I recalled that from memory and no, I'm not ashamed). Just so we're clear, her character is a single, cute, kindhearted, head NFL cheerleader who, by the way, owns her own bar. I mentioned she's single, right? Because this happens all the time.

John Madden and Pat Summerall providing commentary (including one train wreck of a scene where Keanu finally makes a move on Brooke. The Police's "Every Breath You Take" is playing while Madden and Summerall provide commentary like Shane is trying to get into the end zone. I'm not making this up.)

I could go into the plot but it's your standard predictable sports movie with a happy ending, and I AM somewhat ashamed to admit, the ending gave me chills. Just like a good bad sports flick should.

Labels: boobs, football, movie, NaBloPoMo, reviews, unintentional comedy

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 2:39 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: 49ers Game 9 Recap ::

Last week when I was putting in my schedule requests, I considered asking for Monday night off as well so I could watch my 49ers play the Seahawks on Monday Night Football. Maybe even do another Game Diary since the last one kinda fun.

Good thing I didn't. The way they played today, if I had to sit through the entire game I probably would have a few holes in my TV right now, my laptop would be shattered from me hurling it, there would be holes punched in the wall, and I'm pretty someone would have called the police to my place after being frightened from all the noise.

Ok, I'm not really that volatile but given the way team played tonight - the way they've played most of this season - there would have been much anger and frustration on my part. As it was, I worked tonight and had to deal with a steady stream of freaks and retards (you wouldn't think that something as simple and obvious as reading a menu would be difficult but apparently, some people don't get that a menu is where you learn what you can order), weasely co-workers, and lazy busboys but that was still less painful than watching my Niners get shut out by a team that we beat twice last year.

I clearly remember how I was approaching this season with "cautious optimism." Last year, I expected nothing and we went 7-9. This year, I thought we could build on that but... we're now 2-7. The numerous injuries haven't helped but neither has the fact that our quarterback has regressed. Not surprising considering his offensive coordinator last year was Norv Turner (a guy with a history of developing young quarterbacks; for example, Troy Aikman. Ever heard of him?) and is now a guy who used to be in charge changing the urinal cakes at the stadium.

So now, I'm back into that rarified sports fan zone of rooting for a losing season in order to establish some high draft picks. Except that one of our early picks was traded to the Patriots (yeah, like they need help). Ugh. I think I may need a new team.

Labels: 49ers, football, NaBloPoMo, threw up in my mouth

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 11:52 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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:: Football! ::

My little brother sent me tickets to a Dolphins game and I finally got to go to my first football here in Miami. I went with my co-worker buddy Chuck, who's a big Dolphins fan (which is probably why he has a drinking problem). He loves football as much as I do and was so excited that he calls me early this morning about an hour before he came to pick me up.

"Hey, you ready to go?"

"Now? You're supposed to pick me up in an hour."

"Yeah, but I'm just sitting around doing nothing."

I needed a quick shower so I told him to pick me up in thirty minutes. Twenty minutes later he calls again.

"Hey, what kinda beer do you want?"

"Umm, I don't care. I just bought some Sierra Nevada."

"No dude, I'm buying cans. Bottle breaks and shit. You like Coors?"

I wasn't sure what he was planning that we'd end up breaking beer bottles (he's from Texas, maybe he wanted to shoot some empties in the parking lot) but I wasn't going to argue with someone who wanted to buy beer. He picked me up, got a couple of subs, and tailgated at the parking lot for about an hour; eating, drinking beer, and tossing the football around. It was awesome. He got a nice buzz going and as we made our way to the stadium we passed a row of police cars and he said, "hey, let me get a photo of us drinking beer in front of these cars."

What it is about going to sporting events that turns men in their thirties into college frat boys? I don't know but it's awesome.

We found our seats, which were on the upper deck near the red zone. Not quite nosebleed, but we had a great view of the entire field. (It was also my first time at Dolphin Stadium for a game that wasn't baseball). We were surrounded by rowdy DolPhans, though not rowdy enough for Chuck, who tried to start a chant every time Buffalo had 3rd down. He maintained his buzz through the whole game, which was impressive considering they stop beer sales after the third quarter.

If you've never been to a game, you realize how TV-centric the timing of everything is. There were moments where the players on the field were just standing around waiting out a commercial break. We also had to endure the PA announcer, who wasn't that good.

But few things beat seeing an eagle-eye view of the game unfolding before your eyes. Seeing the offensive and defensive formations, watching the play unfold from high up, you really appreciate the complexities of football in a way you just can't grasp on TV. That and being surrounded by the immediate fan response to anything positive (the one touchdown Miami scored) or negative (the four passes Marty Booker dropped) makes the atmosphere and experience a lot of fun. It's also fun if you're seated near an avid who's had one too many beers and tries to start chants by shouting at everyone around him as well as towards the field; in my case that fan happened to be Chuck. Every time the Bills threatened, he's get up and start yelling "GO DEFEEEEENNSE!!!" (He's married to a lovely woman but she's Colombian, which means she thinks that if he's not at home, he's a skirt-chasing bastard. He doesn't get out much.)

As for the the game itself? Not very high scoring, frustrating at times, exhilarating at others, but overall great because it had just enough suspense at the end as to whether or not the Dolphins could pull it out. I need to do this more often.

Labels: alkie, drinking, football, NaBloPoMo

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 9:34 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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