:: Life on Planet Dan-E ::

:: Merry Christmas! ::

I hope your Christmas is merry
Tip the bartender well
As you drown all your memories
Of this past year from hell.

If your '06 was a good one
Then rejoice with good friends
Remember to go on a food run
So they don't eat grandma's depends.

Take time to smell the flowers
Check for corn in your stool
Take advantage of happy hour
'Cuz free booze? That just rules.

I pray your next year is better
I hope your New Year's is a blast
But try not to get any fatter
In which case, next year might not last.

Merry Christmas to all
My happy thoughts I send you
That's right, I said "Christmas"
If you don't like it, well fuck you.

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 6:33 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
.....

:: Ugh ::

Don't read too much into this post or anything but all I'm saying is this:

Yagermeister? Evil. Just.... evil.

I'm not druhnk posting. (Buzzed posting, perhaps. Drunk? Umm.... lemme get back to you.)

EDIT: I lost count of the number of drinks I had last night (I know there was rum and Yager involved) but again, no hangover. I'm starting to enjoy this.

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 4:51 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
.....

:: I Must be Getting Old ::

Last night after work, I went with a co-worker to the Pawn Shop to see a band called "The Bravery." I've heard of them but she's apparently a huge fan and needed someone to go with.

It was fun and all but the concert was loud enough that I had trouble sleeping thanks to the incessant ringing in my ears. This never happened in my 20s.

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 9:02 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
.....

:: Server Stories: Part XIII - You're no better than your Waiter ::

There was an huge art exhibit in Miami this week called Art Basel and for those of us in the service industry, it was a pretty lucrative week. However, we had endure an unusually heavy slew of dickhead customers, not surprising since a lot of these idiots try to convey the pretense of "artsy-ness," rather unconvincingly, I might add. (Being "artsy" isn't an excuse for forgetting basic table manners.)

So that inspired me to write up a post about the type of douchebag customers a waiter or bartender has to deal with on a weekly basis. I got about halfway through it but I stopped because I ran across this post written by another Miamian named White Dade.

It's a great post detailing a few points about how not to be a horrible customer whenever you eat out. Of course I was a little miffed since he made his points a bit more clearly, or rather more bluntly, than I would have. Whatever, check it out.

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 5:58 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
.....

:: Server Stories: Part XII - Shift Drinks ::

Anyone who's ever worked at a restaurant in any capacity knows that every once in a while, you absolutely need a drink or four afterwards. It's not exactly a secret that waiters and bartenders like to drink and I'll be the first to tell you I'm not exception.

Still, considering that I've been at work from 10:30 in the morning till 1:45 at night, it probably wasn't the wisest of decisions to go out with a couple of co-workers for drinks afterwards and have four beers and a Tanqueray and tonic (I swear on my mother's grave - if she was actually dead - that I didn't order that, it was the bartender's mistake and I drank it anyway because, you know, it's still booze) while I was exhausted after long - albeit lucrative - day. Now, four beers for me is normally nothing but take into account a long exhausting day and a rare empty stomach on my part and I'm thinking right now that maybe I should have just gone straight home. Not that I'm drunk blogging or anything but I have a nice buzz going right now.

And to think, I get to do this all over again at 4:30 tomorrow... er... today? Ugh. I'll let you know how it goes. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go pass out.

EDIT: So I woke up around 11:00 this morning feeling fine. This isn't good. It's just going to encourage me.

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 3:33 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
.....

:: Just a Thought ::

What's the difference between my mother and pits bulls?

Pit bulls eventually let go.


As a matter of fact, she did call me yesterday. Why do you ask? :P

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 2:43 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
.....

:: Nine Layers ::

I forget whose blog I found this on but since I hadn't posted anything in a while, this is a good way to get back into it.

LAYER ONE:
Name: Dan-E
Birth date: 1974
Birthplace: Earth
Current Location: Miami, FL
Eye Color: Brown
Hair Color: Dark brown/black
Height: 5'10"
Righty or Lefty: Righty
Zodiac Sign: Libra

LAYER TWO:
Your heritage: Human
The shoes you wore today: Flip Flops
Your weakness: Blue eyes; great smile; rare steak; sushi
Your fears: Public speaking; not realizing my potential; cockroaches
Your perfect pizza: Pepperoni, mushrooms, and extra cheese on a pan crust; Thai chicken
Goal(s) you'd like to achieve: Play guitar better; find a good job at a kick-ass ad agency; get my weight below 200

LAYER THREE:
Your most overused phrase on AIM: I don't use AIM
Your first waking thoughts: "Shit." Or "fuck."
Your best physical feature: My legs
Your most missed memory: Going for a Double-double run to In 'n Out burger at one in the morning with my buddies

LAYER FOUR:
Pepsi or Coke: Diet Coke.
McDonald's or Burger King: In 'n Out
Single or group dates: People do group dates even after they're out of college? Seriously?
Adidas or Nike: Whatever's on sale
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Tazo
Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or coffee: Coffee, black, hot

LAYER FIVE:
Smoke: Smoke what?
Cuss: Fuck yeah
Sing: In the car, sometimes in the shower
Take a shower everyday: Yes
Do you think you've been in love: Yes
Want to go to college: Not any more
Liked high school: NO
Want to get married: Yes
Believe in yourself: Most of the time
Get motion sickness: No
Think you're attractive: Depends
Think you're a health freak: Yes. (Which is why I love eating deep-fried bar food while downing an ale or three.)
Get along with your parent(s): I'm dead to them
Like thunderstorms: Yes
Play an instrument: (Air) Guitar

LAYER SIX:
In the past month...
Drank alcohol: Yes
Smoked: Smoke what?
Done a drug: No
Made Out: Yes
Gone on a date: Yes
Gone to the mall?: Yes
Eaten an entire box of Oreos?: No
Eaten sushi: Yes
Been on stage: Hell no
Been dumped: Yes
Gone skating: No
Made homemade cookies: No
Gone skinny dipping: No
Dyed your hair: No
Stolen Anything: I took home some steak rub from work a few times without telling anyone.

LAYER SEVEN: Ever...
Played a game that required removal of clothing: Yes
Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Yes
Been caught "doing something": No
Been called a tease: No
Gotten beaten up: Yes
Shoplifted: It was an accident
Changed who you were to fit in: Yes

LAYER EIGHT: --
Age you hope to be married: Umm, pre-death?
Numbers and Names of Children: Not having kids. Ever. I know "never say never" but screw you. Never.
Describe your Dream Wedding: Small intimate gathering at a nice restaurant where the foutain is a keg pouring Sierra Nevada.
How do you want to die: In a blaze of glory
Where you want to go to college: I'm done with college
What do you want to be when you grow up: Rock star
What country would you most like to visit: Australia, Brazil, parts of Canada, and Europe (I know it's not technically a "country" but, whatever.)

LAYER NINE:
Number of drugs taken illegally: One
Number of people I could trust with my life: Two. Maybe three.
Number of CDs that I own: 300 or so
Number of piercings: Does a piercing stare count? (That was lame.)
Number of tattoos: None. Yet.
Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: Never. But I hear my name is all over the post office.
Number of scars on my body: A lot
Number of things in my past that I regret: Two. Maybe three.

Now, I'm supposed to tag nine others but... nah.

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 2:36 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
.....