:: Life on Planet Dan-E ::

:: Monday, April 10, 2006 ::

:: At Least I'm not a Data Processor ::

I've been a server at my restaurant since December and I've gotten pretty good at it. Not to say that I wasn't a good waiter at my previous jobs but every restaurant has their quirks and my current place of employment is no different. If anything, there are more quirk to try to get used to. It took me a couple of weeks after training to figure out how to work everything (the "computers" we use are older than some of my underwear. And that's pretty old.) but thanks to my previous experience the adjustment went smoothly and I seem to have figured out the how to work the joint at maximum efficiency. I'm not quite as adept as some of the other guys who are career waiters and bartenders but I'm good enough at this that I can support myself pretty easily.

The majority of my customers leave happy but over this last weekend, I've quite had a few patrons tell me I'm a "great waiter" before leaving. Just last night, I won one of our "server competitions" where I sold the most lobsters, stones crabs, and a certain bottle wine for that shift and brought home a nice bottle and $20 for myself as a result. You'd think I'd be happy about this but... eh. If anything, this weekend kinda left me depressed.

You guys remember that episode of "Friends" during the first season (of course you do!) where Chandler quit right after being promoted to senoir "Data Processor?" (It was called "The one with the Stoned Guy.") His reason for quitting was that his job was supposed to be only temporary, but he's been at this for five years now. Accepting this promotion would be like conceding that this is what he's going to do for the rest of his life. In order to figure out his career path, he goes and sees a career conselor. after nine hours of testing, he's perfectly suited for... Data Processing.

You may be wondering what all this has to do with my current employment status but let's just say that I can relate to his situation somewhat. But unlike Chandler, I don't have the luxury of being able to quit being as it waiter wanna-bes are a dime a dozen in South Beach, and they're not going to offer me a higher salary with a corner office. I mean, they can't even guarantee weekend shifts on a good section (And don't even try to figure out how it is that I can recall details of that episode of "Friends" so well despite not having seen it in a while). It's a little disheartening to spend $28,000 (for just tuition) on art school and have random strangers tell you you're a "great waiter" for recommending that Merlot from Chile to go with your Salmon. And don't even get me started on the fact that women in their 40s and older seem to love me. (Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, other than that I kinda wish it was women in their 20s.)

And this is despite the fact that one of my former classmates and I used to joke about being able to servers or bartenders and having something to fall back on if this advertising thing doesn't work out (he has a nice job in Philly now). Now, don't get me wrong; if the worst thing I can complain about right now is a job that I sometimes don't like, I lead quite the charmed life. I don't have to worry about going hungry or homeless. I have good friends and a girlfriend who loves me (more than I deserve). This is why I tell my left-brained friends that they should be happy they're not creative types. They have *real* problems. My problems are existential. And personally, I'd rather have one with tangible solutions.

But at least I have a good bottle wine to enjoy until I do.

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 1:55 AM [+] :: | 0 comments
.....