:: Life on Planet Dan-E ::

:: Saturday, October 22, 2005 ::

:: Week 7 Picks ::

This week's picks is a little late since my short term memory seems to be gone this week. So anyway, here they are:

Chiefs over Dolphins:
Maybe it's just me but with the first-hand coverage I see of the Dolphins here, I thinking Ricky Williams still looks stoned. And the next time someone tries to tell me that I look "scruffy," take a good look at him. Last Ricky bit, I promise: I wanna see him score a TD and see a celebration dance that mimics him taking a bong hit. Just because.

Packers over Vikings:
Ever time I see Daunte Culpepper throw yet another INT, I keep thinking of a friend of mine that had an yearly hard-on for Culpepper for his Fantasy Football team. While I'm not playing this year, I can just imagine that he's been attending some sort of FFL support group for guys who own Daunte. Assuming he hasn't already set himself on fire. Also - and this is just me - but if worked the PA at the stadium where the Vikings were the visiting team, I'd be playing "Love Boat" anytime the Vikings did anything.

Chargers over Eagles:
I don't care if McNabb had a week off to recuperate. He's hurt, he can't move, and the Eagle's running game is a joke. (I was gonna say "running" joke but that's too easy.) Tomlinson is gonna absolutely shred the Igles' defense. How do you say "there's always next year" with a Philly accent? Donovan's mom is gonna need a lot of soup to console the team after this loss.

Saints over Rams:
The Saints always played the Rams tough, even back during their high-scoring Kurt Warner era. I'm of the theory that fatigue eventually gets replaced by anger and after last week's pounding from the Falcons, the Saints are PISSED. Also, Bulger is replaced by Jamie Martin. That's almost as bad as being replaced by Tommy Maddox.

Redskins over 49ers:
This one's personal. The Niners trading away Tim Rattay and handing over the tattered reins to Alex Smith might say "we're committing to the future of our franchise." What it really means is "we have every reason to suck donkey nuts this season." I don't care if Smith is the second coming of Peyton Manning. He's gonna look like Ryan Leaf since he's surrounded by talent equal to that of baseball AA minor league team.

Colts over Texans:
At least Houston has the Astros to fall back on.

Steelers over Bengals:
Sure Cincy has a great record but they've played teams that have a combined record of 5-17. Carson Palmer is very good but he's also played mediocre defenses. As for Pitt, Big Ben is back in the huddle for the Steelers this week. I don't care which one of the receivers are available. Just the fact that Tommy Maddox isn't playing is good enough for two extra scores.

Browns over Lions:
I don't wanna say things are bad in Detroit but I just read that both Chrysler and Ford are getting better customer satisfaction ratings than the Lions.

Seahawks over Cowboys:
Seattle always plays well at home and Dallas... excuse me... Drew Bledsoe is ripe for a four-INT game.

Cardinals over Titans:
Anyone out there think that Cade McNown won't start? Not only will he start but he's gonna have yet another game that gives desperate FFL owners ulcers. 27-48, 371 yards, 2 TDS, 4 INTs. I say this with no disrespect or irony, but those are vintage Kurt Warner numbers.

Broncos over Giants:
I never thought I'd see the day where Tom Brady would be out-QB-ed by Jake Plummer and Mike Shanahan would out-coach Bill Belichick but there it was. Granted, Brady almost engineered yet another miraculous comeback but he?s no Plummer. At least not that week.

Bill over Raiders:
Raiders are playing with a hyperactive Kerry Collins and without an injured Randy Moss. It's like giving the pyromaniac the Zippo and locking him in a fireworks factory: it may look pretty from a distance but it's really, really bad for everyone directly involved.

Ravens over Bears:
Hmm. Team with a great defense and a crappy QB versus a team with a great defense and a crappy QB. I say go with the team with the crappy QB that has tenure.

Falcons over Jets:
Jets on the road, playing against a hungry Falcons team led by a young, mobile, and often spectacular QB. The jets are countering with an old, banged-up team led a by a washed-up, plucked-from-retirement, QB that moves slower than I do after three hours at Brazilian BBQ buffet.

:: Miscellaneous Ramblings by Dan-E at 5:24 PM [+] :: | 0 comments
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